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Thank you as always to Lise for the super beta

Audabee for hosting my words.

 

 

Kathryn strolled down the corridor lost in thought. It was the middle of the night, the lights were dimmed, and her footfalls barely made a sound on the carpeted floor.  This was the third sleepless night in a row that she’d spent walking the hallways. As she’d found the past two nights, there was not a soul around. Most of the crew was asleep, except for those few working to get the ship ready for the upcoming mission.

She came to the end of the hallway and using her access code, let herself into the darkened room beyond. Outside the large durasteel windows was the Utopia Planitia Fleet Yard, and she could see work being done on her ship. Large robotic arms flitted around the elegant saucer section testing hull integrity, and even though she couldn’t see it, she knew that the inside of the ship was crawling with technicians running last minute checks on the warp core and sensors.

She knew the name of the ship, the class, her maximum cruising speed and she’d been regularly apprised of the modifications made to this vessel to make it more responsive. Kathryn had poured over the schematics for hours and knew where every corridor, Jefferies tube and door led.  She knew everything about the warp core, inside and out and about the chemicals used in the gel packs that lined her ship.

She knew the names of all the crew and their backgrounds; hell, she’d even made it point to learn something about their families, but despite the endless days of preparation and years of working to come to this point, she was – well - nervous.

It wasn’t the mission that she was anxious about but rather the responsibility that fell so heavily on her shoulders.  The lives of so many depended on her leadership abilities. Would she be able to inspire them, to earn their trust, would they believe in her capabilities?  She had been the leader on many missions in her career, but there’d always been the fall back, the person on whom the responsibility had ultimately lay.

This time there was no one. It was just her.

She leaned her head against the window. Despite the coldness of space beyond, the pane felt oddly warm.

 I wish Dad were still alive.

The thought just dropped into her mind. It had been years since she’d felt that way; felt that she really needed to talk to him. She had her mother and even though they had a long conversation before she’d left for space dock, there were some things that she couldn’t share with her. Some things that only her father, the Admiral, would have understood. Just this once she would have loved to feel his comforting hand on her shoulder telling her that she had nothing to worry about, that she would make an excellent Captain and that he was proud of her.

She started at the sound of the door sliding open, wondering if her wishful thinking had conjured him out of thin air.

It was her mentor.

 “Owen, what are you doing here? “

“Came to see you off” he walked to her side by the window.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see that the robots working on the ship had vanished.

USS Voyager was ready.

“He would have been proud of you, you know.”

“I...” she shook her head and turned away. Would admitting that she was nervous be a sign of weakness in a newly minted Captain?

She felt his hand on her shoulder “I was terribly nervous when I was given my first ship. It will be fine, you will be fine. Once you sit in that chair, nothing else will matter. There’s no other feeling that even comes close. And remember Katie, you are not alone, you are never alone, you have the full support of Starfleet behind you.”

Her combadge chirped.

She tapped the button. “Janeway here”

“Captain Janeway, please report to the Bridge, we’re ready.”

She turned and looking up at Owen, nodded “I’m ready too.”

 

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