Author's Chapter Notes:
The story will be posted in parts but it is finished.  An R version can be found at ff dot net.

Disclaimer: I own nothing in any of the Trek universes. Obviously.

Notes: Some of these notes are important unlike the disclaimer. This is a dark A/U story. It's also going to get pretty twisted in places so don't read if you aren't into that. It probably covers multiple triggers. You have now been warned. No worries that the story will go unfinished. If you're still with me, I hope you enjoy.

Many thanks to Froot for generously stepping up and doing a bang-up beta job for me on this one. That being said, as usual, all mistakes are mine cause I played with it after she fixed it the first time.  Thanks to Audabee for giving my words a home.


"This may get unpleasant for us, Ensign. Do your best, but don't be unnecessarily heroic." – Admiral Owen Paris (Mosaic by Jeri Taylor)

Despite Their Intentions

"You requested this meeting, Gul Lavik. What is it that you would like to discuss?"

She heard her father's voice. But that wasn't right. Her father wouldn't be in her bedroom. It was just a trick of her subconscious, part of a dream that she was still waking up from.

"The Cardassian Empire has annexed several colonies recently and due to other recent events it was determined that, as a matter of good faith, we should inform the Federation of our new boundaries."

Something wasn't right. Aside from the fact that her entire body ached and she felt like she was trying to think her way through a fog, there was still something off. Why was anyone in her quarters discussing the Cardassian Empire?

"You claim to have annexed Urtea II and its moons," her father said. "Urtea is a Federation system."

"It was," the voice replied. "Now all of the Urtea system falls under the Cardassian Empire. Their people have sworn allegiance to us."

Urtea II. That sounded familiar. If she could just remember, something about Urtea was there in her mind. She could feel it. And why did she feel so horrible? Tarkelian flu hadn't even made her ache this much and it had taken her three weeks to shake it.

"You're also making claims regarding the capture of two Federation spies?" her father asked. "What nonsense is this, Gul?"

"I suppose it could be nonsense. The two alleged officers were wearing Federation uniforms, flying a Federation-marked shuttle, and claimed Federation ranks at the time of their capture. I suppose they could have been lying," Gul Lavik allowed. "The girl was quite young to be a Starfleet officer. When questioned, she claimed it was her first deep space mission."

Kathryn finally got her eyes open and realized she was not in her quarters. She had no idea where she was. The only thing that became clearer was the conversation she was hearing. A viewscreen built into the wall showed a typical Starfleet conference room and her father along with two captains and one of his long time aides sat at the end of the long table.

"You claim to have two Federation officers in your custody?" Edward Janeway asked, his voice harder than Kathryn had ever heard it. "What are their names and ranks?"

"Admiral Owen Paris and Ensign Kathryn Janeway…oh," Gul Lavik paused. "I apologize, Admiral. I hadn't made the familial connection. Is the ensign your daughter?"

She blinked, trying to focus on the screen. Her father's face was tight and the cold look in his eyes was one she was thankful had never been directed at her. Black spots danced in her vision as she tried to push herself up to see him better.

"Admiral Paris and Ensign Janeway were killed in a shuttle accident six weeks ago," her father warned. "Take care in what you claim next, Gul."

Six weeks! Kathryn swung her legs off the small bunk and had to close her eyes as the room spun and her stomach lurched. Disjointed images swam in her vision. Dark clothes she had never seen before. Stone walls. A single squared light in the back wall. Was she in a cell? Where was her uniform? How did she get here?

"Then you claim the officers were indeed yours?" Gul Lavik asked. "My supervisors will be glad to hear that. Our government was unconvinced that the Federation would so blatantly attempt to place spies on one of our own planets-"

"Admiral Paris and Ensign Janeway were on a scientific mission to retrieve sensor data from a moon. They were not spies," the captain seated next to Admiral Janeway interrupted.

"They were caught in possession of highly technological sensor equipment that had recorded far more than simple stellar phenomena, Captain," Gul Lavik insisted. "They had files showing Cardassian ship movements, in-depth scans of passing Cardassian ships, as well as long range scanning equipment calibrated to identify military depots on neighboring planets that are none of the Federation's concern."

She was starting to remember. The shuttle mission, Admiral Paris, halo objects. The Urtea II moon. She scrubbed a hand over her face as she tried to piece her memory together. A Cardassian ship had appeared from behind the moon.

"But we would not expect you to believe us. We brought proof." Gul Lavik said and pushed a data PADD across the table towards the Federation officers. "They confessed."

And then she heard her own voice.

"Ensign Kathryn Janeway."

A male voice asked, "Where are you stationed?"

"Federation Starship Icarus."

"What is your position on the Federation Starship Icarus?"

"Science Officer."

"Who is your commanding officer?"

"Admiral Owen Paris."

"What is your mission?"

"To study massive compact halo objects."

"Do you have a secondary mission?"

"Yes."

"What is it?"

"To obtain information regarding Cardassian military movements."

It felt like a brick had just been dropped into her gut. It was her voice. Monotone. Drugged probably. But it had been her speaking. The recording angle only showed her father and the other officers as they watched the small device, but she saw the way his knuckles whitened.

"State your name and rank," a different male voice demanded.

"Admiral Owen Paris."

"What is your position?"

"Commanding officer of the Federation Starship Icarus."

"What is your mission?"

"Obtain information regarding Cardassian military under the guise of studying massive compact halo objects."

"And who will you report your information to?"

"Admiral Alynna Nechayev. Starfleet Intelligence."

Her father shut off the recording and dropped the PADD to the table. Kathryn held her breath as she continued to watch; it was hard to dispute evidence like that. She felt horrible that she had so easily given up the information and even worse that her father had seen her failure. It was small consolation that Admiral Paris had apparently fared no better. It only then occurred to her to wonder where he currently was. And what other information they had coerced from him. The dread growing in the pit of her stomach worsened when she realized she had no memory of anything she had confessed to. She had no memory of anything since the shuttle.

Her father pushed to his feet and threw the PADD across the table towards the Cardassian. "How dare you interrogate two Starfleet officers and then come in here demanding concessions? You will return the two officers to us immediately. Then, and only then, will we even consider speaking with you about other matters."

Her heart soared at her father's demand. He was going to save her and Admiral Paris. It was a childish whimsy, but the idea of her father swooping in and delivering her out of this cell had her grinning as the Cardassian also got to his feet, the camera angle shifting with him as he put distance between himself and her father.

"I'm afraid you misunderstand, Admiral," Gul Lavik said. "We have no officers to return. Admiral Paris and Ensign Janeway were found guilty of spying on the Cardassian Empire, a crime punishable by death. Your daughter was executed three weeks ago after we determined she had no further useful information, and Admiral Paris' sentence was carried out yesterday morning."

It felt like her heart seized in her chest and she was glad she was still seated. Admiral Paris was dead. No. After all, she was obviously still alive. She wouldn't believe Lavik's lies; her father would never believe him. Not without proof. Not without…

"Return their bodies to us," her father demanded.

"I'm afraid that's not possible. The bodies have already been incinerated." The camera angle jostled again as Lavik reached into a compartment on his belt. "However, we thought you may require further proof." He slid two vials across the surface of the table and into her father's hand. "Those vials contain the third molar of both Owen Paris and Kathryn Janeway. I believe they will supply you with enough genetic evidence to properly identify their source. If your medical sciences are as adapt as we believe them to be, you will also be able to identify that the teeth were removed after death had already occurred."

Her hand flew up to her cheek. She pressed against the side of her mouth, her tongue surveying her rows of teeth. She felt a tender half-healed hole on the upper left side of her jaw. The wound wasn't fresh, but the nausea in her stomach doubled at the idea of not remembering something as traumatic as that. What else didn't she know?

"If what you say is true, Gul Lavik," her father said quietly, and she shifted her eyes back to the screen to see her father staring at the two vials he held in his hand, "then you've just started a war."

The viewscreen blinked off leaving her stunned, blinking against the sudden darkness. Light flared into existence outside her cell, illuminating a hallway and the edge of what she assumed was a force field. A tall, thin Cardassian stood on the other side of it, staring in at her.

"Do you know who I am?" he asked.

She didn't know any Cardassians; why would she know him? But he looked… something about him was familiar. She got to her feet, moving closer to him, her muscles stiffly protesting any sudden movements.

"Should I?" she asked.

He smiled, not unkindly. "We've spent the last six weeks together. Unfortunately, the truth serum we used on you during that time has a nasty side effect. It blocks memory formation in most species."

She was missing six weeks. Six weeks in the care of Cardassians. She swallowed tightly. "Who are you?"

"My name is Gul Camet." He bowed slightly at the waist. "And according to our official records, you are Prisoner 1392, a twenty-five year old female Terran, formerly of Starfleet, formerly of Earth." He checked the PADD he held in his hands and made a notation on it. "I think I'll call you Twenty-five; it falls off the tongue a little easier than your official designation."

"My official designation is Kathryn Janeway." Her chin tilted upwards. "I'm a Starfleet ensign and a citizen of the United Federation of Planets."

"According to Federation records, Kathryn Janeway is dead. The Cardassian Empire executed her three weeks ago. And according to Cardassian records, Kathryn Janeway is dead." He gestured towards the blackened viewscreen. "I had hoped showing you the recording would help you reconcile that. The person you were is gone. I'm told that your family on Earth held a memorial service in your name more than a month ago. For all intents and purposes, for anyone that ever knew you before you came to Cardassian space, Kathryn Janeway is dead. "

His calm rational demeanor and cold recitation of facts scared her more than she ever wanted to admit, but she shook her head. "No. I'm alive. And my name is Kathryn. Janeway."

He sighed. "That's the problem with using the truth serum. Once it wears off, the subject has forgotten everything they've been taught, and we have to start over from the beginning." He pulled a boxy controller off his belt. "If you can, please, try not to scream."

He pressed the top button on the controller and excruciating pain flared across her entire body. She collapsed to the floor, muscles seizing, her throat constricting even as she heard the scream rip from her body. She was blinded by the pain it was so intense, radiating out and back again along her nerves, pulsing intensity bubbling through her veins. Then like a power conduit shutting off, it stopped, leaving her trembling and panting on the floor as echoes of the current skittered along her skin.

Camet knelt opposite her on the other side of the force field. "I'm sorry, Twenty-five, but I know you better than you know yourself. I know what it will take to break you." He let her see the controller was still in his hand. "Try to accept your fate."

He pressed the button again and her world shattered into white.


.

You must login (register) to review.